New Year, Same Me
The New Year is often considered a time for new beginnings, a fresh start. A chance to become a new you, a better model. I think as I’ve gotten older, parts of me have become wiser. Not all parts of course. I am just as gullible as the next girl to the new, low carb bread, the moisturizer that makes you look like you’re 16 and the jeans that give you a “I do lots of squats at the gym” butt. However, when it comes down to the basics of who I am, what I expect of myself and where and what direction I want to see my life go in, I definitely feel like I’ve gained confidence and perspective.
My grandmother used to have a little cloth sign hanging in her kitchen that I loved to read and try to understand. It read, “ A wise old owl lived in an oak, the more he saw the less he spoke, the less he spoke, the more he heard. Why can’t we all be like that old bird?” If I’m being honest, I used to feel really sorry for that bird. His life sounded terribly boring, just hanging out in that tree, listening to everyone else live and doing nothing with his life. Now, having lived quite a bit myself, I now envy that bird. He lives a life of peace, doing what he wants, when, why and how he wants. He’s smart enough to stay out of the chatter he’s not interested in and chooses his daily path with intention.
This year I have been working a lot on myself. I’m seeing a nutritionist to try to make sure I am a healthy example to my children and I go to therapy in an effort to settle old quarrels with myself and unresolved issues I’ve held on to. I’m focused on making sure to take time for myself and pursue things that interest me, other than my precious family and doggies. Trying harder to keep up with loved ones and friends on a regular basis, and taking time to exercise, be it a simple walk with my pups or a good gym workout.
I sat to reflect and think of the year ahead (with my holiday panic left happily and abruptly behind me) and it came to me clearly. There’s no new me that I will be searching for this year. I have and will continue to make my fair share of mistakes and wrong turns in the road but, I have reached a point in life where I am strong and proud of the person I am. That doesn’t mean I am finished growing or have learned all I need to know by a long shot. It just means to me, that I am proud of the person I am, where I have been and where this life will take me, and I hope you are too. We can all continue to grow, listen and learn but we have all already done and been through much to get to where we are today. Don’t throw that away for a new version of yourself. This may be a new year, but it’s the same us and we’re doing pretty well.
I may not be a wise old owl yet, but I hope to be like him someday.